First date and thereafter

I believe people are interested in many things, sex is merely one of them, and it is part of the natural progression of things as two people spend time together. So it is not necessarily true when men are labelled as “only after one thing”.

Now know that I am not talking about first date sex necessarily, but even having said that, if both people agree, why is it a stigma that if first date sex happens, it is one party’s "fault"?

If two people decide to be naked and horizontal, and neither has any issues with it, then perhaps it is absolutely fine, and it is not an awful thing. Sex is a physical thing. Hunger and thirst are as well. If you are hungry, you eat. If you are thirsty, you drink. Why is it taboo that if you are horny you have sex?

I tend to develop deep emotional feelings for someone to share something purely physical. Perhaps, along the way, my brain releases too much of oxytocins and it cause me to be bonded to someone whom I have met. Literally, I fall on someone I just met after some intimate sessions and I am being hooked. I wish there is chemical that boost my testosterone and my brain do not put out this oxytocins. Looking at this, shall I say it is all biological, but not emotions at all?

Life is too for us to deny ourselves pleasure over some stale societal mores. Protection, respect for each other, mutual consent and desire, etc these are mores too.

I am fine in the aftermath of casual encounters but not the case after a meaningful one. I may be satisfied after a meaningless one, but the feeling of being used and wish to develop further haunt me when I meet the right one resulting in letting myself down.

Up until this point, I have shown no evolutionary advantage in these.

Special dedicate this trivial poem to the Si Anjing, Sang Kancil, and Cacing Hutan I have met in OZ land.

Another night alone, going out again
To the bar that everyone goes to
When there's nowhere else to go
Funny how they all seem so happy
Downing shots of liquid depression
But don't think I'm so self-righteous
Trust me, I've had more than my share
Many a night, I've out drank them all
My own private island of oblivion

So I cover up the loneliness
Pick the best of an all out crowd
Where one's no better than the next
Start the show, pretend you care
About who's doing who, while you're doing them
Because there's no one else to screw with
Don't you know your voice is grating
Nails down a big black chalkboard
One more shot out of tune that out

Just shut up & get it over with
The night is almost spent & I'm getting bored
Remember the way you came in
Because soon you'll be on your way out
Don't think I'm cruel because I'm rushing
It's be nice to say it's not about you
But the buzz's wearing off, making me ill

So, come on, get your things
Yeah, great, I'll see you next week
The cycle will repeat again, I am sure
But hopefully it's not with me cause
I pray it's with anyone but you
Hours of prep work to scope out a place
When everyone else is doing the same
Funny you think you're high on the order
For me...one more shot out of tune you out