Saturday, August 22, 2009

在RedHat Restaurant 里有感而发。

漆黑的夜里,飘渺着小雨,狂风肆虐的刮着,吹动着我凌乱的心。我在等待,等待着它的停止。一杯杯的清茶,让我想起了彭佳慧的回味。

茶水能静心,却满是波涛, 心是难以平静。

我是不甘心就这样结束,没有梦想的灿烂就黯然凋谢。过去几年前的平淡无漪,是我追求的。
  
但是……
  
背叛伤心了人,苍老了容颜,痛苦了记忆。

我没有奢求什么,只是一个比较不简单的生活,一个世俗人所憧憬的朴实的未来而已。

2007 , 2008 年留下最深刻的是痛苦的回忆,它折磨了我的记忆,它划下了满目疮痍,伤痕累累的容颜。撕心裂肺的记忆是那令人窒息、痛彻心扉的伤。

这一切一切是我的青春,我把青春写给了你,憧憬迎着朝阳,你却奔向夕阳。
      

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

相隔4909miles
你从记忆里溜走未曾说再见
你不该邂逅我
不该放任你对我一时的喜好
给我渴望的故事
留下丢不掉的名字

时间难倒回空间易破碎
二十二小时的爱情
是我一生难忘的美丽回忆
享受幸福的错觉
误解了快乐的意义
不够时间好好来爱你
早该停止愚昧的游戏

愿被你抛弃就算了解而分离
不愿爱的没有答案结局

*参考广岛之恋

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

夜已深,无法入睡。这夜里,一惯地独守空闺,注定了言语的沉默,而思绪却在被所牵引着奔腾向前,不能停止。 是安静的夜,而又潜伏着无穷的波动。

释怀了黑暗的冬天,春天,我并不期待,释怀了一味的多愁善感,喜悦,我感到陌生。

安静的夜有鸟儿的吱叫声为伴。鸟儿的叫声,响一阵接着一阵,像是对我窃窃私语,传达着春天的希望。

在那个陌生的异乡,置身在不到十五平方公尺的卧室里,窗外的冷风捎来遥远的悲伤。我痴痴地出神,闭上含泪的眼睛,泪水滋润了我的双眸,带着阵阵暖意,再睁开的那一刻,心灵得到片刻的净洗。

在经历无奈等等一系列感情打击之后,显出了从未有过的心如止水。我想,无论是怎样的命运安排,就等着去接受吧。即使前方是一片黑暗,那里也有牵引和温暖我的一双彦手,牵我走向一路的欢笑,一路的希望。  

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Working issue

Everyone should has a job, not just for financial sake, but you do need that spiritually, to recognise how much structure, affirmation and sense of purpose paid work supplies, and a feeling of competence and security.

As far as I am concerned, employment statistics are fairly slippery. In my own circles, I know of people who would not be counted among the ‘unemployed’ statistically but are certainly without work, or without work much earlier than they would have wished. I have acquaintances around who are not working in their profession of study, (perhaps this apply to most people), or those who simply idling their time without doing anything in their life. The latter do survive, they are just naturally resilient enough and thanks to their strong family who pick up financial slack for them.

As for myself, apart from the research degree I am currently working on, I have been working as academic tutor in UNSW for several 2nd-4th year undergraduate courses as well as master by coursework courses in my field upon graduation.

My areas of tutoring involve:

Engineering Mechanics
Linear Systems and Control
Engineering Design
Numerical Methods
Aviation Technologies
Computational Engineering
Computational Fluid Dynamics




Achievement up to date, I am head tutor for Numerical Methods in which the enrolment is more than 200 students. To be frank, I do enjoy the experience of teaching in tutorial class alongside with the lucrative pays. I find it as soft landing, so different to the head scratching research works.
Less juice in the brain is required.

My UTMKL mates as well as UNSW mates…

More than half of them secured their jobs in Singapore and leading comfortable life now. Salute to them. And those who are still spending hours each day trawling the net for opportunities in Singapore, keep up your hopes, creativity and tenacity and I sincerely wish you all the best!

Singapore sound like heaven for them in this context, in the sense that working in Malaysia brings you nowhere. Similar to me who currently residing in Australia, my ultimate settling benevolent land would be US. I firmly believe I can achieve much more in US with the unlimited resources there. The gateway to there? Nothing else but my PhD along with my tantamount research experience.

For this reason, as well as out of common thoughtfulness, give priority to activities that lift you spirits and connect you to the world, look at your potential from outside the square. I firmly believe the best don’t usually succeed, but the better knowing what he/she can improve from may outweigh the best. Wherever we are on the work continuum, we need to think with some energy and resourcefulness.

Found this assessment in my old drive the other day, here goes my online Cognitive Ability Test for Coles position application back in 2007.



It is flattering to find myself categorised in the top 4%. But guess problem solving skills are not really required there.

Saturday, August 08, 2009

悲欢离合,人间百态,爱之别离,难舍难分。
恋人之别,执手相看,情至深处,哽咽无语。分别之后,两相思念,朝思暮想,牵肠挂肚,焦虑不安。天各一方,离别之苦唯有情字难舍。

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

冬天的早晨,外头吹着冷风,绿草是寂寞;广坎的天空没有飞鸟的痕迹,白云是寂寞;空荡荡的房间没有你的欢声笑语,我是寂寞。

推开窗子,一阵刺骨的寒风急急涌进,我颤抖着身子把窗子重重地关上,你的一个来电,房间温暖如春了。

由里外望,仿佛蒙上了一层轻纱,朦朦胧胧的。提起手指头在IPHONE上精心绘出心上人的名字。心上人的名字,永远是最迷人的字眼。

我幽幽地走到电脑前,缓缓地坐在椅子上,进入电脑视窗的当儿,我又对窗外世界发了一阵子的呆。是冬天,我的神经有点粗。

我开了音乐,宥嘉的歌曲在房间环绕,被歌声包围的我,想念着和你共度时光的那一刻。

晃晃忽忽看见NEWTON building 顶上炊烟袅袅上升,原来是炊烟看见云的寂寞,化为烟云缠绕厮守。然而我内心的寂寞,有谁来陪伴?


Saturday, August 01, 2009

A celestial encounter that have changed me to some extent

It is a total period of three and a half month where I found myself trawling the net for the chance to see you logging to your profile. It was indeed soul destroying when my efforts were largely met with silence. More poignantly, I somehow have maintained a stubborn belief in myself to keep up my hopes and tenacity. Such stubborn self-belief was accurately identified by few of my friends, in the face of daily disappointments.

For the last three and a half month, I have been putting myself in the risk of becoming seriously demoralised and depressed hopelessly. Natural resilience is just a way too far down the road. Uncertainty and loss have been dominated my life.

Every now and then, I felt a gripping loss. Intelligence often reveals itself as a sort of active alertness.

I constantly talked about such bizarre encounter yet with an affecting radiance that you would felt as if I have met someone really special.

“This is the one who are so perfect in everything” I said, emphasising the perfection visibly awed by the experience. In reality, nothing comes close to this.

Until yesterday, I saw the face that was vaguely familiar and yet I have a bit of doubt in recognising. I gave a dismissive look. I could feel that my heart was pumping so smooth that blood flow was so laminar and nonchalantly in my artery. The stability, at such low Reynolds number, the ‘inertial terms’ (the force of driving to you) has become relatively unimportant. The ‘flow pattern’ is merely determined by the balance of ‘viscous forces’ and the ‘pressure gradient’. Viscosity has damped out any turbulent effects. There were just so many synthetic factors that were built up to disrupt such laminar flow whilst interfering stagnant zones.

My consciousness, my brain has gained back its normal functionality and logically dictated, I have been conforming you so much to the definition of perfection all these while.

Now, I have mitigatedly seen the tunnel of light and I am looking forwards the daily life with feeling of competence and security.