Mid-life

It dated back in 2011 when I completed my doctorate program and kicked off my career as an academic.

There were times, usually when insomnia hit or the weather was crappy or a question gnawed at my curiosity, when I broke down and started researching again. Sometimes, I helped outside friends to pull PDFs from academic article subscription services using university resource; other times I tried really hard to publish papers together with ex-colleague, whether tagging along or by working together for mutual benefit.

For the last two years there was a constant fear I had spent too long in the university and I have reached the final stage of my life: Legacy. There was occasion when I was travelling to work passing by graveyard, the thought set in: “would I die here in Australia or should I move back to Malaysia so that I could rest in peace in my home country?”

I was quite blessed to have decent pay and full-time job in my academic career life. For all the jobs that I applied and shortlisted, every interview sessions propelled me to successful appointment-from UNSW, to relocating to Abu Dhabi then coming back to Sydney for Macquarie University. Most of my mates could not even get into academia or job that match their qualification after their PhDs. There were bouts of anger as I hear about other brilliant, skilled dudes who did not get a job because they have too much education.  

Leaving academia is not easy.  There are few places that allow me to work whatever hours appeal to myself and worry primarily on one or two things.  This makes academia a very sheltered and privileged place. I thought it could be hard to step out from the comfort zone. However, my trial in January and the subsequent duties I was tied to in the following month, it seemed that I have been adapting well.

Today, I am coming to accept that I am a Recovering Academic and looking for a way to pursue the next tier of life on my own terms. I have taken my first step early this year stepping out from academia for the greener fields outside the ivory tower. My worth is now determined by how I set direction, complete difficult tasks quickly, and working with people towards a common goal. Leaving academia does not mean leaving behind the part of mine that thirsts to acquire and share knowledge. Rather, I am now venturing into the new area, blockchain in Finance.