Over hardworking-spoil the market

I have been working pretty hard for this whole week due to my approaching thesis submission deadline. Albeit all these hard works, if I were to compare with this guy, he outweighs me. He is exceptionally hardworking, engages himself weekdays, weekends, day and night.

Qimyi : So what about this guy in your lab?

Me : Oh, I am fine with him. I merely comment that he is superb hardworking, you know, working 7days a week, from day to night.

Qimyi : It could be the efficiency issue, some people need more time to work on little things, or perhaps mind was wandering around and not really attended to the work.

Me : No, this guy is fully focused! No msn, no skype, no facebook, no sms.

Qimyi : Wah, like that I got nothing to say. I can only tell, this people spoil the market.



Yes, it is the term “Spoil the market” that I have been looking for.

Three years ago, the process in securing this research scholarship as a First Class honor student was considerably smooth and so I maintained my easy pace till now. Then just a year ago, this guy came in with his Second Class Bachelor award, desperately committed to his research, working a way too hard. Comparison wise, I look lazy.

To some extent, I am not willing to let down my ego. To me, I am not being paid to work this hard and if I have to, then I must be award with more funds. I know what I want to achieve, I just want to finish off with a dissertation, a title and I will kick myself out of here.

Unfortunately, the truth is, I do not have this bargaining power. It is either I do it, become a valuable asset to this laboratory, or I become a liability.

Employer wise, I will definitely hire this people. Employee being, it is definitely a pain in the ass working along with such people when you want to lead an easy life.

Word to myself, if I think that I am not being paid to work hard, then by all means, do as I wish. But remember if you don’t do it, someone else might take over.

生日点滴


Prior to my birthday eve, there were all moment of poignant, working on a paper that never seem to end, writing up chapters that have to stick with the proposed submission plan, etc. My birthday eve however, put on a thoroughly enjoyable show, and it lamented the end of these points, an age that seems impossibly old and far away.

I resonated the whole morning by drafting the paper that is to be submitted to a high impact factor journal publisher, hoping it will bring me the greatest sense of achievement. I could not get it done though, but I believe I will kill it by the end of this week for sure. I took a nap then.



It was 4pm by then before I headed to the city.

I have a great dinner, favourite crab. I caught a moment when I laugh out hysterically of a stupid Tan Ah Kao joke till I grab the attentions from everyone in the restaurant. At that point of time, I really miss my high note laughing tone friend Vixon as well as tornado-like laughing style- Hui Tao.



A session of karaoke followed up. It is absolutely unexpected for the turn up of Marimo and Piglet. Pooh family with the absence of Eeyore aka Vixon though. Your presence touched me and flooded me with much thought. I have seen friends come live in my territory, then leave no longer quite what I could call friends, to be replaced by other kind people with whom I share the intellectual tract. It seems like a continual coming and going of the occupants of this benevolent land that I am living on.



For my blog's birthday post, my dedication to you:

For one grand over of facebook friend who left me a birthday wish, I respond with a sincere thank you.
For friends who wished me in person, I am here to express my gratitude towards your thoughtful and warm wishes.
For those who happen to visit here, thank you for your support and time.

Dear readers, those who have regularly followed my meanderings and those who occasionally drop in and those who are totally new to my zealous opining, I hope you'll stick around, till after my next birthday post.

I am 26

Yep, I just turned 26. A year passed a quarter of a century. I defy the fact that I will march into 30s soon, though a quarter of my life has gone by indeed, holding on the theory that I may live to be a centenarian.

I miss writing for myself so much that it is my gift to myself today to make time to write just for me and put aside for university works, the research works, the rest of life that seems to always supersede this craft that I cherish so much.

I find myself all caught up in self-reflection.

I could never ever have guesses, how much I would enjoy my adulthood than I did my childhood. I was so doom and gloom as a youngster, stricken with the infirmities in a broken town in a woefully broken culture, that I could not have begun to guess what grandeur my life might hold. But, I am profoundly grateful this is what I was made from, and where I came from, the place where I learned to live comfortable, unlearned the lies that misinformed me of my inadequacy, and I saw my image in the mirror with clarity.

Now I look back my years in OZ land. At 23, I undertook my prestigious PhD, and now I sit amidst the last semester of my graduate program, I realise that it is not terribly surprising that I made it this far. I give great thanks to how much I have been enriched with university experiences, veer in between students and academics, a little maturity but not too much. I am having these spiritual moments that I could achieve much more with my current position, believing in myself that it is my ecstatic period of my life would be all uphill from this point. There are going to be holy existential pinnacles, over and over again, in the coming years.

Today I make a dedication to Lim. I spent long years in reflection with striving, uplifted human being to discover what hidden potential that we might unlock in each other. I gained much. I did authentically believe that it would be a successful partnership, we would learn to make it work through many years. I was fear to live without it once because it simply means too much but having you later evolved out of it, I was deeply saddened and scared at the prospect that it is just not going to be what I hope it to be. I learnt that life can be just as fulfilling and may bring me to unimagined shores being myself, I will be at peace with my singularity. I woke up from a dream today, a nightmare it used to be, but I have a deeply restful night of sleep.

I am entering this age with nostalgia and delight, some regrets but much gratitude, and full of zest for the years to come. Thank you, those of you who have shared this journey with me, those who chose me and those who got stuck with me through life’s random assignment or karma or whatever has brought us together. You make it worthwhile. Dong, Tan, and Chow, your existences have propelled me to places that I could not have dreamed possible. I am spellbound by the magic of your wishes and the ever-building crescendo of my blessed life.

Twenty-six today, and it is the prime of my life.